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The Phantom Oracle (Vampire Innocent Book 5)
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The Phantom Oracle
Vampire Innocent Book 5
Matthew S. Cox
The Phantom Oracle
Vampire Innocent Book 5
© 2018 Matthew S. Cox
All Rights Reserved
This novel is a work of fiction. Any similarities to real persons, places, or wandering spirits is purely coincidental. No portion of this book may be reproduced without written permission from the author.
ISBN (eBook): 978-1-949174-90-8
ISBN (Print): 978-1-949174-91-5
1
The Worst Summer of My Life
Somber thoughts keep getting in the damn way of hanging out with my friends.
Like, seriously, brain. Leave me the hell alone for a couple damn hours at least. Here I am, at Michelle’s place, trying to enjoy the last few days of the worst summer of my life—not an exaggeration, since my life technically ended, and well… I think being murdered qualifies as crappy.
But yeah, every time there’s a quiet moment, I catch myself thinking about depressing shit. Like how my friends and I aren’t kids anymore, our days of not having responsibilities are over, summer vacation’s about done. And how college, work, and real life are going to pull my friends and I apart. That sort of crap.
And, honestly, it’s total maudlin bogosity.
At least for me. I’ll forever be eighteen. Chances are kinda slim I’ll ever have a career. It’s more likely Seattle will see seven straight days of sun—or the Seahawks will make it to the Super Bowl two years in a row. So, yeah… I’m sitting here with my two best friends, feeling like I’m standing at the dock while they pull away on a cruise ship I’m not allowed on.
Then again, Dad constantly rambles about how much he misses his childhood and not having any responsibilities. What happened to me isn’t that bad, honestly. Fate decided to pick a reasonably good place to kick me out of the simulation and enable the cheat codes. It would totally suck to be stuck as a child forever, like my siblings’ ages. Even as a vampire, looking like I’m ten years old for the rest of eternity would create a whole crapload of problems. Couldn’t exactly go wandering around a city at two in the morning without attracting attention. And, geez, I get the ‘kid’ thing bad enough now. I don’t even want to think about how other vampires would react to me if this happened while I was that young. And, part of me hopes that never happens. It’s too sad thinking about a little kid dying. Vampiredom has a rather steep entry fee.
On the other hand, at eighteen, I’m still physically young enough to get away with shit—and my Innocent bloodline making me look young for my age helps. I’m like Schrodinger’s kid, stuck in some quantum state simultaneously adult and child while being neither. Also, I’ll never grow old, complain about not fitting into clothes I used to look great in, watch my body slowly succumb to the ravages of time, and so on. Granted, I can’t exactly go to my fortieth high school reunion without causing a fiasco. I’d be surrounded by people like Kurt Wimmer who’ll no doubt be full of himself about becoming some high-powered corporate executive, lawyer, or some such thing, basically sweating money and power. I can just picture him bumping into me: ‘Oh, Wright, what did you do with your life?’
I grin, imagining myself saying ‘Not much, just decided to stay eighteen forever. How’s it feel being fifty?’
Fun to think about, but I’m not that petty. Besides, who knows if Kurt will stay a jerk. Some guys do grow out of that.
“Ugh.” Ashley flops back on the sofa. “I can’t believe summer’s over already.”
“No shit, right?” Michelle stands and collects empty iced tea glasses.
“Heh.” I flash a wry grin. “At least last summer was killer.”
Both of my friends stare at me. Michelle shakes her head in an ‘I can’t believe you went there’ sort of way while Ash’s eyes redden.
I sit up from the mega-slouch I’d fallen into. “Sorry. Gotta laugh at that stuff or it’ll drive me nuts.”
“You’ve been in a mood all day.” Michelle walks past me toward the kitchen. “What’s bothering you?”
“Yeah.” Ashley hops off the recliner and plops down next to me, arm around my shoulders. “It’s only the end of summer vacation. Not the end of the world.”
Her over-enthusiastic hug shakes me back and forth.
“It’s mostly summer being over, but my brain is turning it into a metaphor for like the end of our childhood and stuff.”
Michelle raspberries from the kitchen. “Come on, Sare. You can’t honestly want to stay a kid forever. Personally, I can’t wait for the freedom of not having to base everything I do on what my parents want.”
I refrain from pointing out I have no choice in the matter. Staying a kid forever is exactly what I’m going to do.
“I’m gonna miss being able to hang out all day and do goofy stuff, too.” Ashley smiles. “But, really… we haven’t been able to do that for a couple years at least. ’Chelle’s got a point, but it is kinda scary to think about leaving home.”
“Who are you kidding?” I poke her in the side. “You’re going to live with your mom as long as you can get away with it.”
“Well…” Ashley puts on the same face she wore whenever her mother caught us raiding the cookie cabinet. “For one thing, Mom and I are really close. She’s not overbearing like some parents who shall remain nameless.”
“I heard that,” calls Michelle from the kitchen.
“And,” says Ashley, “have either of you actually looked at things these days? Kids our age—or the age we’ll be when we get outta college—can’t afford to live on their own.”
“Sure we can.” Michelle walks in with refilled tea for everyone. “Put in the required work, make the right choices, and you’ll do fine.”
“So the thirty-year-old professional who’s still living in a one-bedroom apartment with a roommate while working fifty hours a week doesn’t own a house in the suburbs with a pool because they’re lazy?” Ashley rolls her eyes. “It’s not like I’m studying to become a teacher or like majoring in philosophy or English. I’ll make okay money if I make it to veterinarian. Just… why waste it on rent when I don’t have to.”
“Ouch,” says Michelle, grinning. “Yeah, that was damn surreal finding Mr. Martin working at the mall.”
“Yeah.” I whistle. Seeing our sophomore year English teacher working retail at a clothing store in the mall had stabbed my childhood in the side for sure.
“But still. Do you wanna be ‘that girl’ who’s still living at home? How are you gonna settle down with someone? Remember Mr. Dougherty? You don’t wanna be that.” Michelle shakes her head.
Ashley’s face reddens. “I’m not gonna wind up a thirty-two-year-old math teacher living in their parents’ basement, even if my mom can’t afford to help me buy a house.”
“You think my parents are just gonna buy me a house when I graduate?” Michelle leans forward, eyebrows up.
I keep quiet, as both my parents make decent money. Not quite as much as Michelle’s, but definitely more than Ashley’s mom.
“No, not ‘buy you a house’ but I’m sure they’ll help you pay rent. You’re not going ride a bathtub of money straight out the doors of law school.” Ashley folds her arms.
Sensing the tension growing, I fling my arms up. “Guys! Chill. We have two days and a weekend more of summer left. Can we stop arguing like adults?”
“But we are adults.” Michelle sighs and sinks back in the recliner. “Sucks, but we gotta grow up. At least two of us.”
Ashley scowls at her.
I put a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay. She didn’t mean it in a bad way.”
“It bothers you though.” Ashley stares at me like I’m some lost kitten on the side of the road. “You still look sad.”
“I was starting to feel down about losing our childhood, my being ‘outside the game’ so to speak, and some other crap. But, I’m just being stupid. I could be dead. And technically, I still don’t really have responsibilities. Life is a giant video game and I clipped through the walls.”
“Huh?” asks Michelle.
“You ever play a game where you hit a glitch and fall out of the map?” Ashley grins. “That’s Sarah. She’s turned on god mode, playing outside the boundaries of the level.”
“Oh.” Michelle takes a few sips of her tea. “So why are you even going to college then? What are you gonna major in?”
“Phlebotomy,” I deadpan.
Both of them stare at me.
I shrug. “Or maybe cryptozoology.”
Michelle blinks, then laughs. “Are you for real?”
“No. I’m a fictional creature, and I suck at life.”
Ashley groans.
“Seriously?” Michelle cringes. “You’ve been spending way too much time around your dad. You’re way too young—and way too female—to make dad jokes.”
“Yeah, that one was kinda lifeless, wasn’t it?”
Michelle throws a pillow at me.
I get my hands up in time to catch it even though the rainy daylight is still bright enough to shut down my vampire-ness.
“Seriously though. Why bother?” Michelle gestures at me. “You don’t need to work. Hell, you can’t really work. Anything you want, you can just mind-whammy people into giving you. That Aurélie woman sure as shit don’t work.”
Ashley’s eyes glaze over with a love-struck expression.
“Yeah, but she’s older than hell. I dunno. I guess college is just to feel normal. Sometimes, I say it’s because my parents always wanted me to go to college and I don’t want to disappoint them. My not going would only remind them that I died. Maybe that’s part of it, but it’s starting to feel like an excuse.”
“You’re in denial?” Michelle grins. “Trying to pretend none of it happened?”
I raise an eyebrow. “You’d rather I sleep in a coffin, wear all black, and talk with a horrible Slavic accent?”
They both laugh.
“Ugh.” I rake my hands over my hair. “I dunno. Going to college feels like what I should be doing. At least I’m still in the area, right?”
Ashley hugs me.
“Oh, you two should just stop fooling each other and admit you’re madly in love.”
“Hah!” Ashley bursts into giggles.
I know Michelle’s kidding, so I laugh, too.
“For real though.” Michelle wags her tea at me. “What the hell are you going to school for?”
“At the moment, I’m in the computer science/programming track. Could always work at home, and writing my own video games someday could be fun.”
Ashley and Michelle both laugh.
“What?” I ask, biting my lip at a momentary surge of self-consciousness.
“You’re not exactly an über math geek,” says Ashley. “Nor that into video gaming.”
Michelle grins. “Yeah, you’re no Sierra.”
“I’m not that bad at math. Just lazy. And, since my, umm, ‘schedule change,’ I’ve been playing more of them. Kinda hard to go out and do crap outside when it’s fatal. Besides, if I can’t keep up with the math, I might change to an English major.”
Ashley stares at me like I just suggested we kill and eat her mom. “Umm, what? Did you say major in English?”
“Uhh, yeah,” I say, involuntarily doing an impression of Bree Swanson. “I like reading.”
“Why?” Ashley blinks. “The only thing you can do with an English degree—other than wait tables—is teach. And you can’t go outside that early.”
“Could be worse. She could major in art history.” Michelle giggles.
I laugh. “Guys… it’s not like my future depends on my ability to earn a living. I’m never going to work a real job. College, for me, is all about A: feeling normal and B: placating the ’rents.”
“That’s kinda weird you’re having them pay for school and won’t really use it.” Ashley looks down, fidgeting at her pink Hello Kitty sweatshirt.
“I’m going to use it as much as I can. If I stick with programming, I can work from home like Dad. And, umm, English, I dunno. Maybe I’ll write—or wait tables on the midnight shift at a truck stop diner.”
Michelle starts choking on her tea, trying to laugh and drink at the same time.
“If she chokes to death, bring her back as a vampire,” says Ashley.
Still unable to speak, Michelle raises a middle finger. Once she recovers, she sighs, shaking her head. “You can’t make me into a vampire. My parents would kill me.”
Ashley emits a tentative laugh.
“I can’t make you into a vampire because I have no idea how.” I shrug. “Wasn’t exactly awake to watch when Dalton did it to me.”
“Umm. You should learn.” Ashley nudges me. “Like just in case we die. You know what kind of luck I have. I could wind up slipping on something and going head-first into the rear end of a horse and suffocating. Talk about a shitty way to go.”
I can’t exactly die laughing, but I come close.
Michelle cringes. “Okay, Ash, that is like the most disgusting thing I think you’ve ever said.”
“Ash…” After the tears stop streaming from my eyes, I try—mostly failing—to take on the serious parent-to-kid tone like I’m about to discuss teen pregnancy. “If you suffocated to death with your head up the ass of a horse, I don’t think you’d want to come back and remember that.”
She sputters tea, giggling.
“And where the hell did that come from?” Michelle cringes.
“Oh, I was looking at the paperwork for the curriculum. They got a picture of this girl up to her shoulder. Her arm, not her head.” Ashley mimics cringing away from something while reaching forward. “Not sure exactly what she’s trying to grab in there… and the horse didn’t seem too happy about it either.”
We all crack up giggling.
“But yeah… it’s not like I need to earn money for food. And I’m not demanding my parents pay for it. They want to, since I’m not ‘scholarship girl’ here.”
Ashley sticks her tongue out at me. “You could be, but you’re a slacker.”
“I’m not a slacker.” I smirk at her.
“Among nerds, you’re a slacker.” Michelle winks. “Our slackers are ‘mere overachievers’ in the mortal world.”
I snicker. “Oh, come on. None of us are that nerdy… or we’d have been in college by fourteen and designing like new spaceships already.”
“No…” Michelle takes on an air of reverence as if she were talking of fallen war heroes. “Those are supernerds. Nerds the likes of which we can only aspire to be.”
“No capes!” shouts Ashley in a horrible accent.
Michelle tilts her head. “Was that supposed to be French or German?”
Again, Ash sticks out her tongue.
“Michelle,” says Mrs. Gerard, while breezing in from the hallway. Her sand-brown raincoat is so drenched it looks like she went swimming in it. “Don’t forget we have the bake sale at the church, Sunday.” She smiles at me and Ashley. “Your friends are more than welcome to join us.”
I bite back the urge to ask her why a church has to sell cakes to raise money if ‘god’ is supposed to provide. Guess their pastor wants a new car.
Ashley gets a case of the giggles, probably finding some irony in the woman inviting a vampire to a church.
“I didn’t forget, Mom.” Michelle looks off to the side, dodging eye contact with everyone. “I already invited them and they’re both busy. Ash is working and Sarah’s parents need her help with something.”
“Oh. That’s too bad.” Mrs. Gerard sets her fists against her hips and shakes her head. “After God protect
ed their daughter from that boy, they ought’a make time to thank him on Sundays.”
“By selling cakes?” I blurt.
Ashley’s eyes redden with imminent laugh tears.
“Mom…” Michelle sighs. “Remember how you agreed to ease back on the God stuff around people who aren’t into it? Please… My friend almost died. Please don’t turn what happened to her into a sales pitch.”
Mrs. Gerard pauses, then sighs. “That’s not how I meant it. But, all right.”
Michelle’s father enters from the hall, also rain-soaked, and carrying two enormous bundles of grocery bags. “Hey, girls.”
We all wave and say hello as he goes by into the kitchen, lugging their haul.
As soon as Mrs. Gerard follows him and is out of sight, Michelle slouches forward, head down.
“What’s wrong?” Ashley leans on me, but looks at her.
“Ugh,” whispers Michelle. “I wish I could stop going without them disowning me.”
I raise a finger. “Speak the words and reality shall bend to your will.”
Michelle looks up at me. “Do not mess with my parents’ heads.”
“Hey, just saying it’s an option. If you really don’t believe in that stuff, it’s kinda shitty of them to disown you for not going. So much for that ‘love everyone and turn the other cheek’ stuff, huh?”
“It’s not that I don’t believe. I’m not like you two and ‘know’ there’s no God. I just… I dunno. The people there are all so superficial. Everyone smiles at everyone’s face, but as soon as their backs are turned, it’s shredding time. It’s not about spirituality at all, just about looking right. If there is a god, my parents’ church has nothing to do with him.”
“Hang on there a sec,” I say. “I don’t know there’s no god. I just don’t make a habit of believing things people tell me are true just because they tell me so. Show me some proof and I’ll be happy to change my mind.”
“Guys,” whispers Ashley. “Can we not do this again? Especially not with her parents so close? If they catch us questioning their faith, they’ll tell her she can’t be friends with us anymore.”